Hey there, aspiring influencers and leaders! Throughout my journey of learning, studying, applying, and facilitating discussions on the art and science of leadership, I became focused on what I believe is the key to leadership, influence. After writing and publishing my last article, “Unleashing the Power of Influence and Motivation: Exploring French and Raven’s Power Base Taxonomy,” I decided to drill down a bit further and write a series of articles that discuss each of the power bases in more detail.
Today, we are diving headfirst into the fascinating world of influence and focusing on one of the most powerful sources of power: referent power. Strap in and get ready to unlock the secrets to increasing your influence and becoming a true role model that others admire and follow. So, let’s embark on this ultimate guide to boosting your referent power and taking your leadership game to the next level!
What is Referent Power and Why Does It Matter?
Referent power, I opine, is like the holy grail of influence. Think about someone you like, respect, admire, and trust. Someone you are drawn to who inspires you and earns your loyalty; someone you will walk through fire for, someone you know will not steer you wrong, and has the best intentions for you. This is someone who influences you with referent power.
For me, that someone is my college baseball coach, the legendary John Scolinos. Coach led with referent power. I walked on to Cal Poly Pomona because I wanted to play for Coach. I had the good fortune of learning how to play baseball and learning how to navigate life from Coach’s teachings. Coach Scolinos had the ability to find and develop potential in people (his players and students), including me, that would have, most likely, gone untapped.
I hope you have or have had someone like Coach. If so, you know what I am talking about. If not, then strive to be that Coach for someone else. How do you build referent power? Below, we will identify and discuss behaviors that are associated with referent power.
Developing Authenticity: Be Yourself, Everyone Else is Taken!
A key ingredient to increasing referent power is authenticity. “People can sniff out phony from a mile away” (this is one of Coach’s sayings), so it’s crucial to embrace your true self. Several years ago, a person I worked with told me a story about an interaction he had with our organization’s CEO (Chief). Every morning, at about the same time, the Chief would walk through this person’s office and every time he would walk through the office, the Chief would look at the person and say, “Hi, how is the family?” The person would engage in a brief discussion with the Chief but always felt like the Chief wasn’t really listening or even cared about the person’s answer. So, one day, the person tried a little experiment. When the Chief came into the office and said, “Hi, how is the family?”, the person quickly responded with, “killed’em all, and hung them up in the closet.” The Chief responded, “Oh, that’s great” and walked away. The person knew right there the Chief didn’t care and wasn’t listening. The moral of this story is don’t ask if you don’t care and are not willing to listen. The Chief demonstrated inauthenticity and immediately lost credibility with the person.
Authenticity builds trust, fosters genuine connections, and makes you relatable to others. So, drop the mask, be comfortable in your own skin, and let your unique personality shine through!
Building Strong Relationships: It Takes Two (or More) to Tango
Referent power thrives on building strong and solid relationships. How do you build strong relationships? You do so by building rapport, building emotional bonds, actively listening; and demonstrating genuine care, empathy, and concern for others. Additionally, people are naturally drawn to those who share common interests, values, or backgrounds. Finding common ground and highlighting shared experiences creates an immediate connection. When people see that you have their best interest at heart, you will build likeability and a strong psychological contract with them, which paves the way for influence through referent power. When people genuinely like and trust you, they are more likely to say “yes” to your requests. Your referent power becomes the driving force behind their positive responses.
Walk the Talk: Leading by Example
Leading by example is the secret sauce to skyrocketing your referent power and likeability. Your actions speak louder than words, and people pay attention to how you behave. People are inspired by those who walk the talk. Be the embodiment of the values and principles you espouse. Whether it’s going the extra mile, demonstrating integrity, or embracing a positive mindset, let your actions inspire others to follow suit.
Embrace a Growth Mindset: Evolve and Inspire
Referent power isn’t stagnant; it evolves with you. Embrace a growth mindset that fuels continuous learning and personal development. Stay curious, seek new experiences, and challenge yourself. By constantly evolving and improving, you inspire others to do the same, amplifying your referent power along the way.
Sense of Humor: Laughter, the Glue of Influence
Let’s take a lighthearted detour, shall we? A well-timed joke or a dash of appropriate humor works wonders in boosting referent power. Humor adds to your ability to connect and build likeability with others. Laughter breaks down barriers, fosters a positive atmosphere, and helps build stronger connections with others. So, sprinkle some humor into your interactions and let the laughter flow!
The Ripple Effect: How Referent Power Influences Others
Referent power doesn’t just impact your immediate relationships; it creates a ripple effect that extends far and wide. Colin Powell said, “Perpetual optimism is a force multiplier.” I totally agree! As you increase your referent power, you become a catalyst for positive change and optimism. People around you become motivated, inspired, and more likely to exhibit similar behaviors. Your influence spreads like wildfire, igniting a chain reaction of greatness!
Go Forward, Lead, and Create an Environment For Success!
In this ultimate guide to increasing your referent power, we’ve uncovered the key to influential leadership. By embracing and building referent power, you have the potential to become the role model others admire and follow. Authenticity, strong relationships, leading by example, a growth mindset, and a sense of humor all play vital roles in boosting your referent power. As you develop and embody these qualities, you create a ripple effect of positive change, inspiring others to greatness. So, step into your power, embrace authenticity, and let your influence shine. Remember, you have the power to shape lives, uplift others, and make a meaningful impact. Keep influencing, keep inspiring, and watch as the world around you flourishes.